As a weirdo kid, I was obsessed with horror films. My mom and I would bond over our shared love of horror and fright fest. My mom introduced me to the horror genre at a young age, and I fell in love. There was this movie I thought was ridiculous, ‘Killer Clowns from Outer Space’ but I watched it anyway. After all, by junior high, I’d become a pro at watching and living through horror films without fear. No monster had ever gotten me, and Freddy Krueger wasn’t slashing through my pillows, so why not watch this b-movie and laugh right? Wrong.
I’m not sure if it was the fact that clowns are inherently creepy (don’t fight me on this because they are), or that I watched it alone, or maybe even the thought that on some level alien clowns with sharp teeth really were going to come down from the sky and kill me, but this movie scared the sh*t out of me. Anyway, I watched it and re-watched it one million times, and to this day, I am still creeped out by clowns. Like, when I see one, I naturally want to kick him in the balls and run away. There are so many things we have conditioned ourselves to fear in life, and although I could probably write an entire dissertation on my very rational fear of clowns, this post is about the fear we have such a hard time letting go of; the fear of Failure and Success.
Trying to succeed as a writer/actor/producer in LA is unbelievably hard. Everyday, I am rejected, ignored, passed over and left wondering why the hell I even chose this route in life. The talent is God given, and while I know it’s there, getting the right people to notice me is difficult. Outside of submitting headshots, creating my own content, struggling to get auditions, and watching less qualified people succeed based on who they know or how they look, there are also one gazillion women trying to land in the same sweet spot as I am…and that is daunting. Continue reading
To Live & Date in LA has received 4 nominations in the 2016 LAWebfest including: Outstanding Writing in a Comedy, Outstanding Lead Actress, and Outstanding Guest Actor for Mark Ehrenstein in Episode 4, Season 1 “Are We Sluts?” I received both nominations for Outstanding Writing and Acting. I am so proud that my hard work is being recognized, and the wonderful talent of the cast. Make sure to watch all of the amazing To Live & Date in LA episodes, and thanks for your support!
This week I received two rejections: one from Amazon Studios, and another from the popular blog site Hello Giggles, famously ran by Zoey Deschanel. As a writer/actor/blogger I face an insane amount of rejection. But in reality, we all face a large amount of rejection throughout our lives, and it’s how we respond to it that determines our destiny. As one of the few black kids in my elementary school growing up I was rejected by classmates constantly. The only time I was not rebuffed by them is when I was on stage as the lead in a play, or performing in the talent show.
As an actor/writer you’re constantly told you suck. Really…you’re told your audition was not up to par, you are not skinny enough, pretty enough, tall enough, black enough, white enough, funny enough, and so on. I know so many of you have faced the same things. You have been on what seems like hundreds of job interviews that never pan out. Your relationships seem to never go anywhere, you just can’t save enough, or your career goals seem incredibly far-fetched. So, how can facing constant rejection actually help you? Here’s how rejection made me a total badass. Continue reading