One day in 2009, Halloween to be exact, my mom and I went shopping at the mall and began looking for wedding dresses. Let me set the scene; my ex-boyfriend and I had been together over one year and he wanted us to move in together. I did not. I have written about him before…he’s the jerk I lived with and broke up with me over text message. Yes, that happened. Anyway we moved in together after all, and things were going well…and when he told me he wants to marry me I said, sure.
The conversation pretty much went like this: Him: We should get married…maybe next summer? Me: Okay, maybe we can go to Jamaica. So…ummm…yes that’s how the conversation went. I mentioned it to my mom a few months later and here we were in the mall on Halloween and decided to go look at wedding dresses. First we went to Saks. My mom wanted to buy me one of those ten thousand dollar wedding dresses, and I thought that was the craziest idea ever, because who the hell really needs a dress that costs that much? I had the brilliant, (but not highly favored by her), idea to go over to the David’s Bridal store across the mall parking lot and just well, grab something.
Porn can have many effects on your relationship: It can be a teaching tool, it can be a mood enhancer, it can be an inhibition breaker, it can be fun, erotic, and sexy. But porn can also put you or your partner in a perpetual state of fantasy. You may began to compare your lover to the men and women in these movies. At times you may even form an attachment to an actor and think this is how your man/woman should behave when you are intimate. At its worse porn can become an addiction. My ex hid a porn addiction that I thankfully found out about. He would spend hours on the computer with the door closed, and he actually chose porn over being intimate with me. Here is the thing…I was not upset with him for watching it, I was upset with the addiction he formed to it. Continue reading