2023: THE YEAR OF PTSD, ANXIETY & THERAPY

2023 has been the year of PTSD, anxiety and therapy for me. In 2022, I was viciously assaulted by someone in my family who then began to stalk and harass me. There have been many other illegal and horrific things this person and her family members have done, but all of that is for the detective to sort out. All I could do is control how I reacted to it all, and that is where therapy came in and saved my life.

After the assault, and the other sociopathic things this person has done, I started seeing a therapist. My therapist diagnosed me with PTSD and anxiety, and I sobbed for a few days. I am not exactly sure why it hurt me so much, but it did. Not out of shame, but out of disbelief and concern for myself. I knew something was wrong because I would have nightmares about the attack, heart palpitations and feel anxious all the time, but did not think it was at all related to PTSD. I was not that knowledgeable about PTSD and felt it was only something that happened to victims of war, incarceration, and major crimes.

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Quarantine, Anxiety & Ice Cream

Since we are now in year fifty-thousand of quarantine, I wanted to address issues many of us have been facing while living with this pandemic. For me, anxiety, depression, fear, have been reoccurring themes. Whether you have been dealing with feelings of depression, anxiety, stress, or fear, know that we will get through this together.

March 2020 and beyond has been rough for all of us. We are losing jobs, loved ones, financial security, facing food insecurities and death on a massive scale. It is scary as hell. Black Lives Matter and racial injustice movements not only in policing, but also our workplaces are at the forefront as well. Reckoning on a major scale is taking place. Caught on video acting racist and ignorant = lose your job, unless you’re a cop.

Constantly being bombarded with videos of racism, including Black/Brown people being beaten, shot etc. is psychologically damaging to watch as a Black person. These videos are visceral and can bring upon a depression so heavy that you have to claw your way out of it. Losing your job can feel devastating. The fear that accompanies it marries with anxiety and can push you over your emotional edge. The stress of quarantine, COVID, and just trying to buy groceries, is an emotional nosedive many of us are collectively experiencing.

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